After nine months, you know what to expect from pregnancy — but what about when you’re laboring and delivering? While every vaginal birth is different, here’s what you can expect leading up to, during and after those hours of childbirth.

How do you prepare for a vaginal delivery?

While it’s nearly impossible to plan for every aspect of your labor and delivery, you’ll likely appreciate feeling prepared. A few things to think through in advance of your vaginal birth:

The stages of a vaginal birth

For women who deliver vaginally, childbirth progresses in three stages:

Stage 1: Labor

Labor itself is divided into three phases — early labor, active labor and transitional labor. All women who deliver vaginally will experience all three phases of labor, though you may not notice the first phase at all. The timing and intensity of contractions can help clue you in to which phase of labor you’re in, while periodic physical exams will confirm your progress.

Stage 2: Pushing and delivery of the baby

This is when your cervix reaches the magic 10 cm mark — meaning you’re fully dilated. Now it’s your turn to push your baby the rest of the way through the birth canal, unless you’re laboring down (in which case you’ll catch a break for a few minutes to an hour while your uterus does most of the work bringing baby farther down into the birth canal).

You may wonder: Does pushing hurt more than contractions? Most women actually find that transitional labor, or those last 2 to 3 cm of dilation, is the most demanding and intense phase of labor — but it’s fortunately also the shortest, usually lasting 15 minutes to an hour. As your baby crowns and you push him or her out, you will feel a tingling, stretching or burning sensation (it’s called the “ring of fire” for a reason).

Stage 3: Delivery of the placenta

The worst is over. In this final stage of labor, you’ll continue to have mild contractions as your practitioner helps you deliver your baby’s placenta. He and she will examine it as well as your uterus to be sure everything’s as expected.

Pain relief and medication during a vaginal delivery

Vaginal birth doesn’t have to be a pain. A number of medications can manage your labor pain. These include:

  • Stadol or Nubain
  • Laughing gas (nitrous oxide)
  • The epidural (two in three women choose epidurals — and many find they are able to push very effectively with the help of their birth coach)

Meeting your baby after a vaginal birth

As long as you haven’t experienced any complications during labor and delivery, you’ll be able to hold your baby — and breastfeed, if you choose — immediately following delivery, often while you’re delivering your placenta and your practitioner is repairing any tears.

Take the time for some quality snuggling together, and speak up, since your baby will recognize your voice and your partner’s. You may feel an immediate bond with your baby, or you may feel somewhat detached. Both responses are completely normal. No matter how you feel now, you will come to love your baby intensely. Sometimes it just takes a little time.

How long does it take to heal after giving birth?

How fast your vagina will recover after birth varies based on a lot of factors. Healing generally lasts for about three to five weeks if you didn’t have any tearing, and about six weeks if you had perineal tears or an episiotomy.

What is a natural childbirth?

Hoping to skip the medications? Sounds like you’re looking for a natural birth — a vaginal birth with little to no medical intervention. You may want to consider alternative therapies to manage your labor pain naturally, like acupuncture, hypnobirthing, water birth, reflexology and distraction.

While you can get all of these therapies and more by giving birth at a hospital, many low-risk moms hoping for a natural birth choose to deliver in a birthing center, where all births are managed without the use of medication.

Considering home birth? Be aware of the risks and know that not every woman is a good candidate. And you should definitely have a physician or certified midwife present.

What if you need to be induced?

If you’ve reached 42 weeks, if you have a pregnancy complication that puts your life or your baby’s life at risk, or if 24 hours have passed since your water broke and contractions haven’t started, you may need to be induced. Your practitioner will help your cervix dilate and efface, then possibly rupture your membranes (if they haven’t already broken) — and, if those techniques don’t work, administer Pitocin (a synthetic version of the labor-inducing hormone oxytocin). Once your contractions are in full swing, your labor should progress just like a non-induced labor.

What if you want a vaginal birth but need a C-section?

Even if you have your heart set on a vaginal delivery, 1 in 3 moms ends up requiring a C-section. There are a number of reasons your doctor might schedule one:

  • Chronic conditions (like heart disease) that make vaginal delivery dangerous
  • Apregnancy complication (like placental problems or preeclampsia)
  • The size of your baby
  • Your weight or age
  • Carrying multiples
  • Having a baby in breech position

If you are scheduled to give birth vaginally, your doctor may also perform an emergency C-section during the birth process if labor doesn’t start or stalls, if your baby is in fetal distress, if you have a prolapsed umbilical cord or if you have uterine rupture. Just remember: The best birth is always the one that’s the safest — and any delivery that finishes with a healthy baby in your arms is a success.

What is vaginal birth after C-section (VBAC)?

If you delivered by C-section the last time you gave birth, you’re probably wondering whether you’ll be able to have a vaginal birth after C-section (VBAC). In short: You may, though a number of factors can increase or decrease your odds. Talk to your practitioner about what’s safest for you and your baby.

How long does it take to recover after vaginal birth?

The first six weeks postpartum are considered a “recovery” period (you might also hear it referred to as your “fourth trimester”). For the first week postpartum, you’ll likely experience vaginal bleeding, cramps, exhaustion, perineal discomfort, difficulty urinating and making bowel movements, and all-over achiness, among other physical symptoms.

Emotionally, in the first weeks after birth you may have the baby blues or feel jittery, excited, overwhelmed or frustrated. Hang in there. Gradually over time, the symptoms will recede, you will start bonding with your baby, and you will feel like having sex again.

If, however, you’re experiencing symptoms of postpartum depression — including feelings of hopelessness, sleep problems, lost appetite, irritability, social withdrawal, excessive worry and aversion to your baby — talk to your practitioner. Getting the help you need is essential for both you and your baby.